There is no doubt about it... trying to juggle a full time job and a young family is difficult!! I have heard many different ways that parents of young children deal with this and find it very insightful to hear each individual story. Some work part time to reduce the whopping costs of childcare (can be over 1000 eur/gbp a month for 1 child/full time), others rope in the grandparents to help as much as possible. Either way, we've got to work or return to work at some point so you have to find the best situation for you and your family.
I work full time. Apart from a short stint as a housewife, I have worked full time since I was 18 years old. I like having a full time salary coming in and being able to have that slightly nicer house as well. When I had my first child, I still lived in England and suddenly I was faced with this whole new dilemma; how best to balance my work and home life. I felt that my options were quite limited, so I returned to working full time with grandma looking after the little one. This was nice but only a short term solution.
When we decided to move to the Netherlands for a better future for our daughter, we had more support from my husbands family and more options for flexible childcare. We had a good routine going. We were able to work whilst she was having a great time at daycare (she's a very sociable girl).
When my daughter was 3, I fell pregnant again. I thought "we've already made it work with one child, how would one more make a difference". Well at first, I was on maternity leave and my oldest had just started school so we had a specific routine to keep to. This was not too difficult with a little baby. You just had to time the naps and feeding times correctly.
Then after 6 months, I was trying to get back to work so I wanted my youngest to go to childcare like her sister had done so before her. Cue... nightmare!
My youngest was not too happy having 3 different people trying their best to get her to stop crying when I left her there. She just wanted mum or dad. So no surprise to say that this set up didn't last very long. After this little failure, I stayed home with her a bit longer (housewife stage).
A while later, we tried again to get her to go to daycare and this time it worked. I started working again (full time) whilst one kid was in school and the other in daycare. Morning routines had to be specifically timed to get four people up and ready to leave the house by a certain time. There was a lot of hurrying, crying, moaning and coaxing going on in our house in the morning. Even now, when both kids are at school! "Have you got your gym bag, have you brushed your teeth... nag, nag, nag".
Not many mums work full time where I live, and that's great for them I'm sure. You have to make it work in the best way for you. I make more fuss of my kids at the weekends and in the evenings. I use the bed time routine to find out about the day my kids have had and to have a good laugh with them. I love reading bed time stories to them as it's our special time together. At the weekends (when I can part them from their tablets), we walk the dogs together or go to the park, or maybe bake something. We go to the market to buy fresh fruit and veg, which is a family outing that we enjoy.
It's very difficult to juggle these two immensely different aspects of life, but extremely rewarding. I don't think that you should have to put one part of your life on hold for the other, and that is also relevant for socializing and personal time too. We live in an age where you can do it all if you just put in the time and effort.